There is a traditional Balinese values that keeps disturbing me lately which seems to “conflict” with the value that spread globally nowadays. When I say the word “conflict”, it is based on my sole opinion. Maybe the readers have their own opinion, well here is the good old value.

“Let others define you” (in Balinese we said “depang anake ngadanin”)
In the old days, Balinese usually refrained from assessing their self on what they can do or what they can not, whether they know something or do not. They usually let other to judge them whether they were an able men or women or not. For example if someone asked a Balinese whether he can do a task or not they will reluctant to say that he is capable in doing the task though he has capability in doing it. He will usually say, lets give a try, and let you to judge whether he is capable or not.

Speaking of our own ability considered arrogant by the old generations of the Balinese. It seems that the old Tao saying “Those who know do not speak. Those who speak do not know” is implemented deeply on the mind of the old Balinese.

This value shows its great disadvantage in a job interview. When an interviewer asks an interviewee who hold this value his capability or what he can do. I honestly think that he will not get the job, unless the interviewer gives him a chance to show what he can actually do.

Yes, defining or judging someone may be considered rude in some cultures. I have seen many Balinese youngsters wear black t-shirt of a well-known band with a sentence “don’t ever judge me” printed in red letters on the back of the shirt. It seems that judging or assessing someone else is a bad thing.

But I am on the side of Balinese oldies, I will let people asses or judge me since I will make an assessment on every people I met on their knowledge, capability, manner and etc, but I won’t say my judgment or assessment right on in front of the people face, it seems to me a natural thing to do when we meet someone.

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